5 Minutes for Mom

"Mom can you help me?"
"Honey I have no socks"
"What's for dinner?"
"Mom I can't find my swim suit"
"The cat pooped on the floor"
"Can we go to the library"
"Would you pick me up today"
"What am I taking for lunch tomorrow"
Dishes
Laundry
Sweeping
Vacuuming
Cooking

There are so many things that we as moms have to get done in any given day. My list above doesn't even begin to touch what we are expected to do in any given day. I didn't talk about the disciplining of our children, the mild meltdowns when things don't go right, the sheparding of our children that we are tasked with, the run to the grocery store. It is just the standard, every day minor occurances.

If you are anything like me there are times you feel like you are meeting yourself coming and going. You feel like you need to have a couple more hands, a few more heads to answer questions, an extra brain per person in the family, and if you could have just a few more hours in the day maybe you could get not only caught up but maybe even a little bit ahead.

But there are no extras. We are just expected to be supermom. Our husbands try to help out if we're lucky but I know my husband, by about 8pm, is done. Anything after 8pm is going to be left undone. He makes up for it at other times but I am still left picking up dirty dishes, socks, and wiping up spills after he has gone to bed.

My day starts by 8 am (and that's if I had to close at work the night before), if I didn't work I'm usually up at 6. My day ends at midnight at the earliest, and that's if I didn't have to close at work that night. In between I am making meals, making snacks, watering the garden, weeding the garden, picking up after whoever is leaving a mess, laundry, helping my daughter learn and grow, and just trying to make sense of our lives. I am reading my Bible, I am checking job search boards, I am trying to come up with something of substance to blog about. I'm trying to find time to work out.

And yet when I was challenged to find 5 minutes for mom, I felt overwhelmed immediately. 5 minutes? Like in a row? Without being disturbed? And just to be quiet. To meditate on the Bible verse of the day. Are you serious?

I don't want to get up earlier. In my opinion 6 hours of sleep is adequate but I can't take any less. I don't want to stay up any later for the same reason. I don't want to take time away from my husband or my daughter. I don't want to let my housework suffer. I can imagine you are saying, it's only 5 minutes. But what I have learned is that when I take that time to meditate on a verse, 5 minutes is rarely enough. And so those 5 minutes turn into 15 to 30. Now maybe you see my issue.

I have found the perfect time. I found the time when my daughter plays the best, the house is usually at a place I can walk away without leaving things undone, I don't lose time with my husband. It's a win-win-win-win. Right after lunch, when my husband is at work, the dishes are done and usually my kitchen is clean (because this super mom cleans the kitchen as I cook) and I have already made beds and picked up around the house, I have a few minutes that are quiet.

This has become my meditation time. To think about the words that God has given me this day.

No matter how much we have on our plates, no matter how many directions we are pulled, each of us can find those few minutes of quiet time. Some it may be after the house has gone to bed. If you are an early bird, maybe first thing in the morning, with your cup of coffee, is the best time. Maybe it's while your little ones are napping. No time is wrong, it's just what's right for you. I challenge you to find a daily devotional and find 5 minutes or more that you can spend reflecting on that day's verse. If I can do it, anyone can do it. It just may take more creativity.

God bless

Ashley

Saving Money

As money has gotten increasingly tight over the last few months, Alexis has been learning the value of saving money and the importance of not wasting it on candy and donuts (her personal nickle and dimers).

She has decided she wants an American Girl doll. I knew when she said this that Mom and Dad couldn't afford to put that much money into a just because item. Plus I want her to learn the value of money and that it isn't something that is unlimited in supply.

After discussion Jaime and I have decided that for keeping her room clean and wiping out the tub (she's the only one who uses the tub, the shower is in the basement) she will earn $.50 per week. Not much in the grand scheme but it's something. I will also offer her odd jobs around the house (like drying dishes with Mommy after a big meal) for random amounts of money. Thanks to Sarah at SmallWorldI have a better plan. I'll let her tell you about her system for this.

Jaime and I have also been trying to save money. Christmas tends to come up out of nowhere and you never know when you could use a little extra. My favorite way to earn money for Christmas is Swagbucks. You earn points for searching the web, participating in polls and surveys, and having the toolbar. I have redeemed the points for Amazon gift cards but there are Itunes cards, Best buy gift cards and a multitude of other prizes. You should check it out at that link up there and sign up. It's great!

I also have been finding random things around the house that we don't need or want anymore and listing it on Craigslist. It's not much either but as long as I put it away it could add up to some fun money.

What are your favorite ways to save a little bit of money?

God bless,

Ashley

Thirsty Thursday

This was always our name for Thursday when I worked at the dental clinic. After getting on my soap box Tuesday I decided to do something a little more light hearted and fun today.

Here in good ole Iowa it is a scorcher. Yesterday and today have had highs in the 90's with heat indexes in the 100's and it's just been a good idea to stick close to home and stay cool. I'm going to share some of our favorite hot weather drinks...

1. Iced\Sweet Tea -- Who doesn't love a nice cold glass of tea when the temperature boils over. I make both kinds, sweet and iced, depending on my mood.

2. Cherry Limeades -- This is a personal favorite. My husband and daughter don't seem to share my love for it though. A simple way to enjoy it when you can't down a pitcher on your own is a glass of lemon-lime soda with grenadine (also known as a Shirley Temple). Otherwise here is a link to a recipe from scratch.

3. Sno-cones -- I make my own by throwing ice into my food processor and then adding syrup. Yum!

4. Lemonade -- The classic hot weather drink!

5. Water -- when the temperatures get this dangerously high I push a lot of water on my family if we are going outside. Nothing is better!

What is your favorite hot weather drink?

1 Year

A year ago today, June 25th, I married the man of my dreams, my best friend, and so much more.

It hasn't been an easy year. We had our up and downs, just like any other married couple. But we have pulled through. Our marriage is even better now than a year ago because we have learned more about one  another.

I didn't move in with my husband until a month before the wedding. We didn't learn one another's mannerisms, quirks or daily living before we were married. Looking back, part of me wishes we could have waited until after the wedding. On the other hand trying to move and get married at the same time...wow that would have been crazy.

In the last year I've learned that my husband is not fit to be around pre-coffee in the mornings. I've learned that he needs his 8 hours of sleep. I've learned that he doesn't like shows that are faked but he prefers either reality shows like American Pickers or Hell's Kitchen or adult cartoons like American Dad or Family Guy. I've learned that he likes to read. I've learned that, although he is very laid back and generally is open to anything, if he says no he stands firm in that decision. I've learned that his family dynamic is absolutely the opposite from mine. I've learned that he is unaware of his nonverbal cues the majority of the time, and if I call him on them he 1) usually doesn't know what I am talking about and 2) very rarely do they match up to what he says. He also doesn't like when I try to 'read' him, which means he doesn't want me to pay attention to those nonverbal cues.

None of these are bad things (ok my husband pre-coffee is bad but that's not the point). They are just pieces of him that I've had to learn. I find that I love him more all the time.

A perfect example is we have found a balance in the house when it comes to housework and disciplining Alexis. I take care of the majority of the housework. The cleaning, the cooking, the laundry. Jaime does the dishes. However Alexis listens far better to Jaime than she has ever listened to me. And so he tends to take on the authority role in our family. This has required me to adjust some of my attitudes, as I've discussed before. However yesterday, when the house was clean, laundry put away, and I was volunteering, he decided to clean my car for me. Not just getting the random trash out of it, but vacuuming it out and wiping it all down. He did this because he could.

I am learning to see things that he does to SHOW me that he loves me. Yes I like to hear the words, yes I'm a romantic and my idea of showing me is with flowers, candles, dinner, but that isn't how he functions.

He wakes me every morning before he leaves for work with a kiss and I love you. He kisses me good night every night and tells me he loves me. I may say it first, but he always says it back when I do.

He shows that he loves me by cleaning out my car (he knows I would rather clean the house top to bottom than clean my little car.)

He shows that he loves me by going to the store to buy my soda in the morning when I'm not functioning yet.

He shows me that he loves me by letting me sleep when I'm exhausted.

He shows me that he loves me by agreeing to Italian food when he's more of a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

He shows me that he loves me by setting up my sewing area when I mentioned that I wished I had somewhere that was permanent.

He shows me that he loves me by coming to Christmas Eve service because I find it very important that we are together that day. (And has been going with me every Sunday ever since)

He shows me that he loves me by bringing me my dinner at work when I forgot it at home.

All these little things that could easily be overlooked. Overlooked while wishing for a candlelit dinner, or a sappy card, or a bouquet of my favorite flowers. But when I listen to him, and pay attention, I realize that I don't need those things. My husband loves me very much, and he shows me and tells me in his way.

It's been a year, it feels like we've been together a lifetime. In a way we have, our paths crossing but neither of us realizing what was to come. But that's a story for another day.

God Bless

Ashley

A Family Saturday

I somehow got lucky and got the day off. It is wonderful and I feel blessed for the time that I got to spend with my family today.

I started off the day going to the warehouse with my best friend, who is also my daughter's aunt, and my nephew. *For simplicity I just claim them as my own, also I have been in their lives since they were babies and they have called me Aunt Ash as long as they could talk. Telling them, or me, that we aren't family doesn't usually bode well for the speaker* We sorted through the clothes that were brought and ooohed and aahhed over the various things.

The warehouse is what we call it. The actual name is The Appalachian Warehouse. We accept donations of clothing, appliances, furniture, housewares and toys to send to the Appalachian Mountain region for the communities there. Once or twice a year the church that her dad attends will take semi truck loads down and distribute it. They will usually also do some manual labor, like house repairs, while they are there. It is a great cause and I love to volunteer my time, even if my church isn't the one who sponsors the cause.

After that we came home. My daughter managed to harangue her aunt into taking her home, mainly because Jaime and I were already planning on going out later on. Jaime and I ate our lunch together in the peace and quiet and then headed out to their house.

The great thing is that we are friends with the respective parts of the married couple. We had cauliflower and cheddar soup (which was delicious and a recipe is included in this post at the end) and chicken breast. Her husband had all of his top teeth pulled on Thursday and so he needed to have nice soft foods. Then we played a board game.

It's called Anybody's Guess. It is from 1990, and although parts of it are outdated, it is a great game. You can find it here if you want to try it next time you and your married friends get together.

We also decided we wanted to play The Newlywed Game. It sounds like it would be a lot of fun. We get together at least once a month and so some new games sound like a good idea. The other game we want to try out is Cranium.

Without further ado, here is that recipe I promised:

Cauliflower Cheddar Soup (from Fine Cooking)

Kosher salt
1/2 head cauliflower (about 1 lb.), cored and cut into 1-1/2-inch florets
2 Tbs. unsalted butter
1 medium yellow onion, small diced
1 medium clove garlic, minced
2 Tbs. all-purpose flour
1/4 tsp. packed, freshly grated nutmeg
1/8 tsp. cayenne
2 cups lower-salt chicken broth
1/2 cup heavy cream
3 sprigs fresh thyme
4 cups grated sharp or extra-sharp white Cheddar (about 14 oz.)
Freshly ground black pepper

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Boil the cauliflower until tender, about 4 minutes. Drain and let cool slightly. Trim the stems from 18 of the cauliflower pieces and cut the crowns into mini florets about 1/2 inch wide; set aside. Reserve the trimmed stems with the remaining larger pieces.
Melt the butter in a 4-quart saucepan over medium-low heat. Add the onion and 1/4 tsp. salt and cook, stirring frequently, until soft, 10 to 12 minutes.
Add the garlic and cook until the aroma subsides, 2 to 3 minutes. Increase the heat to medium, add the flour, nutmeg, and cayenne and cook for 3 minutes, stirring constantly. Whisk in the broth, cream, and 2 cups water. Add the thyme and bring to a simmer. Stir in the cheese until melted and simmer for 5 minutes to develop the flavors.
Remove and discard the thyme stems and stir in the larger cauliflower pieces and reserved stems. Working in batches, purée the soup in a blender. Return the soup to the pot, season with salt and black pepper to taste. Add the mini cauliflower florets and reheat gently before serving.

***We didn't add mini florets at the end. It was also soupier than we wanted so we added mashed potato flakes to thicken it up. Jaime and I want to try making the soup with some bacon and sausage like potato soup.

What are your favorite games to play when you get together with friends?