Today was not an easy day. Well that's not completely true.
I didn't sleep last night worth a hoot, so I went back to bed after taking dd to school. I took Gpa shopping and he took me out to lunch. I made dinner. I cleaned. It was a typical day.
However I have been thinking this evening.
Alexis (who will be 6 years old on Saturday) is such a special little girl. She is so thoughtful and considerate. Not 100% of the time, did you miss the part where I said she was turning 6? But a good part of the time. A few months ago I bought her a Big Time Rush tshirt that she had been asking for. Her response? "Mom, can we get Araya (her cousin) one too, cause she really likes Big Time Rush too and she's going to be sad that she doesn't have one." She had been asking me for one for a few weeks at this point. And her first thought (after thank you) was for her cousin who she didn't want to be sad.
This past week the teacher asked us to send sunscreen to school with our kids because they were going to be walking to the park and playing games for about an hour at lunchtime. Alexis, after reminding me that she needed it and not to forget, told me that she needed to share with her friend. I said ok because I'm sure in this full, never been open bottle of sunscreen that there was enough for her friend too. She looks at me and says "He's kind of like poor and so we should share with him. He doesn't have much money and that's not his fault" I just wanted to hug her close. What does an almost 6 year old know about being poor?
I am so grateful that she has seen me doing what I can to help those less fortunate, that she has heard me when I say to think of others, that she is kind and considerate. But it also makes my heart ache for her.
We all know that kids can be cruel. We all know the days when the only way to be friends with the 'cool' kids is to be mean, to put others down. And I am so scared that my little girl, who so wants to be friends with every one and wants to make every one happy, will end up caught up in this turmoil.
I remember all too well what the teasing was like. I was on the recieving end of it for years. And she is so sweet and so soft hearted that if she was teased like that it would break her heart, and in turn mine.
All I can do is turn to God and trust that He will help her through these days ahead. That He will protect her heart and He will give me the right words to help her on the right path.
This post from MOD Squad was posted at a time I needed to know someone else out there was going through these same problems. It gave me the hope that I can't always see. And she pointed me back to Him, to God who can always be counted on. He gave me hope when He knew I needed it.